Dear Bruce. My Advertising Mentor.
It’s been so long old friend. I miss you. I have a feeling many of us do. Your energy is one that the world could use right now.
I have been trying to write you, or something about you, for over a year now. If I am being honest, it has taken me a while to get my feet under me. The last time I saw you was on Lunder 9 at MGH. I could barely believe my eyes that you were in the same sort of bed I had been in sixth months before, only one floor up. I smiled and cried and hugged you. Then I hugged Paula, and your brother. I remember being in awe of your joy even in that moment. We took a picture. I never saw it. I think I was still wearing a wig then. The side of your head was shaved. I couldn’t process what we were going through old friend.
We went through chemo and radiation together. We compared notes on the after effects. We made jokes about how precisely they measured our bodies and body parts in order to get “just the right amount of radiation!”. We made jokes about being at our goal weight finally. We cried about the way chemo made our brains different. What the actual fuck dude. How did it all go down like this?
I can tell you what, when we were dancing our tails off on The Anthem of the Seas, with the captains and crew of Royal Caribbean, I never once thought “In a few short years we will both be bald, chemo ridden, radiated, and dying.”. Never once.
Maybe that has always been a part of my problem. I really leaned in to the whole “YOLO” attitude of my millennial stereotype for my 20’s and early 30's. I never once thought about the end being so fucked up. Covid, for one — why did you have to go down in Covid? Brain cancer, for second — why did your amazing brain, of all brains, get attacked?
But I tell you what old friend, walking the walk with you in this life for a short while, was an honor. From the first time we met in 2014, I knew I had found a friend and mentor. A new home in the dog eat dog world of advertising. I remember you asked about my family, and asked where I was from. I reciprocated and your intense pride and love that you showed for your wife and sons was palpable. I instantly realized that you were in advertising because it was a people industry, one that required you to build relationships over time. You knew peoples names. You knew their spouse/partner, you knew if they had kids. You always said “It’s the best, isn’t it?” after asking about someones kids. It was apparent that being a Dad was one of the great joys of your life.
You were just the presence I needed in my life when we started working together in 2015. You were an elder at Mullen, and you behaved as such. You set a tone that we would produce a certain type of work, and we would challenge each other to do our best while respecting each others personhood. I hadn’t had a mentor like that prior to this, and it gave me a bit of hope in a somewhat bleak industry for women.
We always talked about TV shows. Your phenomenal taste always shined through. The last shows I remember talking with you about were: Pose on FX, and The Crown on Netflix. You always admired the storyline as well as the production. But mainly you admired the characters. And that is what you did in life. You admired the characters. This wonderful odd cast of characters that Mullen got together.
You were our biggest cheerleader. You believed in us so much we believed in ourselves. From work, to life, you helped us achieve our full potential. I was a proud member of “people who got to work with Bruce”, and never really asked any more questions after that. You asked us to be honest with one another. You asked us to be honest with our clients. You found a way to make excellent creative without ever being disrespectful. From amazing compromise skills, to an emphasis on in person communication — you showed me how to be human and moral in and industry that is at times neither.
While I miss you so much in 2021, I have to be honest my friend, you are not missing much. You thrived on the positive, and we are in a deficit of such goods at the time.
There are some bright spots here on earth — Adele’s latest album is great. The latest season of Pose is amazing. Succession is amazing. Ted Lasso is a new show that people are obsessed with, and is also, amazing. People are starting to look at the inequities that have plagued us for centuries and a few are actually doing something about it. People are starting to get back into the office — but we have made a big switch to focus more on family life and our children — and I have to think you would love that.
The last movie you told me to watch — over and over again — was The Iron Giant. It’s about a xenophobic government plot and a child and beatnik guy who work to save a robot alien and do the right thing. It is so fitting for you — you loved American culture, but you understood it was good to question authority. I think that is why you liked Rufus Wainwright too — just left of center was a good place for you.
We could use more like you right now on Earth, but we will have to settle for the lessons we learned from you as you lived. Thank you for teaching me so much. I love you dearly old friend.
Love,
ESG
